ell me, tell me then!
     What was it?
     A .......... !
     ? ..........0! So there you are now there they  were, when all was over
again, the  four with them, setting  around upin their judges'  chambers, in
the muniment room, of their marshalsea, under  the suspices of Lally, around
their old traditional tables of the law like  Somany  Solans to talk it over
rallthesameagain. Well and druly dry. Suffering law the dring. Accourting to
king's evelyns.  So help her goat and kiss the bouc. Festives and highajinks
and jintyaun  and  her beetyrossy  bettydoaty  and not to forget now  a'duna
o'darnel. The four of them and  thank court now there were no  more of them.
So pass  the push for port  sake. Be it  soon. Ah ho! And  do you  remember,
Singabob,  the  badfather, the same,  the great Howdoyoucallem, and  his old
nickname,  Dirty Daddy Pantaloons, in his monopoleums, behind the war of the
two  roses, with Michael  Victory, the sheemen's preester,  before he caught
his paper  dispillsation  from the  poke, old Minace and Minster  York? Do I
mind?  I mind  the  gush  off  the  mon  like Ballybock  manure  works on  a
tradewinds day. And the O'Moyly gracies and the O'Briny rossies chaffing him
bluchface  and playing  him pranks. How do you  do, todo,  North Mister? Get
into  my way! Ah dearome  forsailoshe! Gone  over  the bays! When  ginabawdy
meadabawdy!  Yerra, why  would he heed that old  gasometer with his  hooping
coppin and his dyinboosycough and all the birds of the southside after  her,
Minxy Cunningham, their dear divorcee darling, jimmies and jonnies to be her
jo?  Hold  hard. There's three other corners to our isle's cork float. Sure,
'tis well I can telesmell  him  H2 C E3 that would take a township's  breath
away! Gob and I nose him too well as I do meself, heaving up the Kay Wall by
the  32  to  II with  his  limelooking  horsebags  full of  sesameseed,  the
Whiteside Kaffir,  and  his sayman's  effluvium and his  scentpainted voice,
puffing  out his thundering big brown cabbage! Pa! Thawt I'm glad a gull for
his  pawsdeen fiunn! Goborro,  sez  he,  Lankyshied! Gobugga  ye,  sez  I! O
breezes! I sniffed that lad  long  before anyone.  It was  when  I was in my
farfather  out  at  the  west  and  she  and  myself,  the  redheaded  girl,
firstnighting  down  Sycomore  Lane.  Fine  feelplay  we  had  of it mid the
kissabetts  frisking in the kool kurkle dusk of the lushiness. My perfume of
the  pampas, says she  (meaning me) putting  out  her  netherlights, and I'd
sooner  one  precious  sip  at  your  pure  mountain  dew  than   enrich  my
acquaintance with that big brewer's belch.
     And  so they  went  on, the fourbottle men,  the analists,  unguam  and
nunguam and lunguam again, their  anschluss  about  her whosebefore  and his
whereafters  and how  she  was  lost  away away in the fern  and how  he was
founded deap on deep in anear, and the rustlings and the twitterings and the
raspings  and the  snappings  and  the sighings and  the  paintings  and the
ukukuings  and  the   (hist!)  the  springapartings  and  the   (hast!)  the
bybyscuttlings  and all the scandalmunkers  and the pure craigs that used to
be (up) that time  living and  lying  and rating  and riding round Nunsbelly
Square.  And all  the  buds  in the bush.  And the laughing  jackass. Harik!
Harik! Harik! The  rose is  white  in the darik! And Sunfella's nose has got
rhinoceritis  from haunting the roes  in  the parik! So all  rogues  lean to
rhyme. And contradrinking themselves about Lillytrilly law pon hilly and Mrs
Niall of the  Nine Corsages and the old markiss their besterfar, and, arrah,
sure there was  never a marcus at all at all among  the manlies and dear Sir
Armoury, queer Sir  Rumoury, and the old  house by the  churpelizod, and all
the goings on so very  wrong long before when they were going on retreat, in
the old  gammeldags, the four of them, in Milton's  Park under lovely Father
Whisperer and making her love with his stuffstuff in the languish of flowers
and feeling to find was she mushymushy, and wasn't  that vely both of  them,
the saucicissters, a drahereen o machree !, and (peep !) meeting waters most
improper (peepette!)  ballround the garden, trickle trickle  trickle  triss,
please, miman, may I go flirting? farmers  gone  with a  groom and  how they
used her, mused  her, licksed her and  cuddled. I differ  with  ye ! Are you
sure of yourself  now?  You're a liar,  excuse me!  I  will  not  and you're
another!  And  Lully holding their breach of the peace for them.  Pool  loll
Lolly!  To give  and  to  take!  And to forego  the  pasht!  And all will be
forgotten! Ah ho! It was too too bad to  be falling  out  about her kindness
pet and the shape of O O O O  O O O O Ourang's time. Well, all right, Lelly.
And shakeahand. And schenkusmore. For Craig sake. Be it suck.
     Well?
     Well, even should not the framing up of such figments in the evidential
order bring the true truth to  light as fortuitously as a dim seer's setting
of  a  starchart  might (heaven  helping  it!)  uncover  the nakedness of an
unknown body in the fields of blue or as forehearingly as the sibspeeches of
all  mankind  have  foliated (earth seizing  them!)  from the  root  of some
funner's  stotter all the soundest sense  to  be found  immense  our special
mentalists now  holds (securus  iudicat orbis terrarum) that by such playing
possum  our  hagious  curious  encestor bestly  saved  his  brush  with  his
posterity, you, charming coparcenors,  us, heirs of  his tailsie. Gundogs of
all breeds were beagling with renounced urbiandorbic bugles, hot to run him,
given  law,  on a scent breasthigh, keen for the worry. View! From his  holt
outratted across the Juletide's  genial corsslands of  Humfries  Chase  from
Mullinahob  and  Peacockstown,  then bearing right  upon  Tankardstown,  the
outlier, a white noelan which  Mr Loewensteil Fitz Urse's basset beaters had
first  misbadgered for  a  bruin of some  swart,  led bayers the  run,  then
through Raystown  and  Horlockstown and, louping  the loup,  to Tankardstown
again. Ear canny  hare  for  doubling through Cheeverstown they  raced  him,
through  Loughlinstown and Nutstown to wind him by the Boolies. But from the
good turn when he last was lost,  check, upon Ye Hill of Rut in  full winter
coat with ticker pads, pointing for his rooming house his old nordest in his
rolltoproyal  hessians a deaf fuchser's  volponism hid him close in  covert,
miraculously  ravenfed  and  buoyed  up,  in  rumer,  reticule,  onasum  and
abomasum, upon (may Allbrewham have his mead!) the  creamclotted  sherriness
of  cinnamon  syllabub,  Mikkelraved, Nikkelsaved.  Hence hounds  hied home.
Preservative perseverance  in  the  reeducation  of his intestines  was  the
rebuttal  by  whilk he sort of git  the big  bulge on  the  whole  bunch  of
spasoakers, dieting  against glues and gravies,  in  that sometime prestreet
protown. Vainly violence, virulence and vituperation sought wellnigh utterly
to  attax and  abridge, to  derail  and depontify, to enrate and  inroad, to
ongoad and unhume the great shipping mogul and underlinen overlord.
     But  the spoil  of hesitants, the spell of  hesitency. His  atake is it
ashe,  tittery  taw  tatterytail,  hasitense  humponadimply, heyheyheyhey  a
winceywencky.
     Assembly men murmured. Reynard is slow!
     One feared for his days. Did there yawn? 'Twas his stommick. Eruct? The
libber. A  gush? From his visuals.  Pung? Delivver him, orelode! He had laid
violent hands on himself, it was brought in  Fugger's Newsletter, lain down,
all  in,fagged out,  with  equally melancholy  death.  For  the  triduum  of
Saturnalia  his goatservant had  paraded hiz  willingsons in the Forum while
the  jenny infanted the lass to  be greeted  raucously (the Yardstated) with
houx and epheus and measured with missiles too from a hundred of manhood and
a  wimmering of weibes.  Big  went  the  bang:  then wildewide  was quiet: a
report:  silence: last  Fama put  it under ether. The  noase or the loal had
dreven  him  blem,  blem, stun blem. Sparks  flew.  He had fled  again (open
shunshema!)  this   country  of  exile,  sloughed  off,sidleshomed  via  the
subterranean shored  with  bedboards, stowed  away and  ankered  in  a dutch
bottom tank, the Arsa, hod S.S. Finlandia, and was even now occupying, under
an  islamitic newhame in his seventh  generation,  a physical body Cornelius
Magrath's  (badoldkarakter,  commonorrong canbung)  in Asia Major, where  as
Turk of the theater (first house all flatty: the king, eleven sharps) he had
bepiastered the buikdanseuses from the opulence of his omnibox while as arab
at  the  streetdoor  he  bepestered the bumbashaws for the  alms of a para's
pence.  Wires   hummed.   Peacefully   general   astonishment  assisted   by
regrettitude had put a term till his  existence: he saw the family saggarth,
resigned, put off his remainders, was recalled and scrapheaped by the Maker.
Chirpings  crossed.  An  infamous  private ailment  (vulgovarioveneral)  had
claimed  endright,  closed his  vicious  circle,  snap. Jams jarred.  He had
walked  towards the middle of an ornamental lilypond when innebriated up  to
the point where braced  shirts meet  knickerbockers,  as wangfish daring the
buoyant  waters,  when rodmen's firstaiding hands had rescued  un from  very
possibly several feel of  demifrish  water. Mush spread. On  Umbrella Street
where  he did drinks  from a pumps a kind workman,  Mr  Whitlock, gave him a
piece of wood. What words of power were made  fas between them, ekenames and
auchnomes, acnomina ecnumina? That, O  that, did  Hansard tell us, would gar
ganz Dub's ear  wag in every pub  of all the  citta! Batty  believes a baton
while Hogan hears a hod yet Heer prefers a punsil  shapner and Cope and Bull
go cup and ball. And the  Cassidy--Craddock rome and reme round e'er a wiege
ne'er  a waage is still immer and immor  awagering over it,a  cradle with  a
care in it or  a casket with a kick behind. Toties testies quoties questies.
The war is in words and the wood is the world. Maply me, willowy we, hickory
he and  yew  yourselves. Howforhim  chirrupeth evereachbird!  From  golddawn
glory to glowworm gleam. We were lowquacks did we not  tacit  turn. Elsewere
there  here no concern of the Guinnesses.  But  only the ruining of the rain
has  heard.  Estout pourporteral ! Cracklings  cricked. A human pest cycling
(pist!) and recycling (past!) about the  sledgy streets, here he was (pust!)
again! Morse nuisance noised. He was loose at large  and (Oh baby!) might be
anywhere when a disguised exnun, of huge standbuild and masculine manners in
her  fairly  fat  forties,  Carpulenta  Gygasta,  hattracted  hattention  by
harbitrary conduct  with a homnibus. Aerials  buzzed to coastal listeners of
an oertax bror collector's budget, fullybigs, sporran, tie, tuft, tabard and
bloody antichill cloak, its  tailor's  (Baernfather's) tab  reading  V.P.H.,
found  nigh Scaldbrothar's Hole,  and divers shivered to think what kaind of
beast,  wolves, croppis's or fourpenny friars, had devoured him.  C. W. cast
wide.  Hvidfinns  lyk,  drohneth  svertgleam, Valkir lockt. On his pinksir's
postern, the boys had it, at Whitweekend had been nailed an inkedup name and
title,   inscribed  in  the  national  cursives,  accelerated,   regressive,
filiform, turreted and envenomoloped in piggotry: Move up. Mumpty! Mike room
for Rumpty! By  order, Nickekellous Plugg; and this go,  no pentecostal jest
about  it, how gregarious  his  race soever or skilful learned  wise cunning
knowledgable clear profound his saying fortitudo fraught or prudentiaproven,
were he  chief,  count,  general, fieldmarshal,  prince, king or  Myles  the
Slasher  in his person, with a moliamordhar mansion  in the Breffnian empire
and  a place of inauguration on the hill of Tullymongan, there had been real
murder, of the rayheallach royghal raxacraxian variety, the  MacMahon chaps,
it  was, that had done him in.  On the fidd of Verdor the rampart combatants
had left him lion with his dexter handcoup wresterected  in a pureede paumee
bloody proper. Indeed not  a few thick and thin  wellwishers, mostly of  the
clontarfminded  class, (Colonel  John  Bawle  O'Roarke,  fervxamplus),  even
ventured  so  far as  to  loan  or beg  copies  of D.  Blayncy's  trilingual
triweekly,  Scatterbrains' Aftening Posht,so as to make certain sure onetime
and   be  satisfied  of   their  quasicontribusodalitarian's  having  become
genuinely quite  beetly dead  whether  by land whither by water.  Transocean
atalaclamoured him; The latter! The latter!  Shall their hope then be silent
or  Macfarlane  lack of lamentation?  He  lay under leagues  of  it  in deep
Bartholoman's Deep.
     Achdung! Pozor! Attenshune! Vikeroy Besights Smucky Yung Pigeschoolies.
Tri  Paisdinernes  Eventyr  Med   Lochlanner  Fathach   I   Fiounnisgehaven.
Bannalanna Bangs Ballyhooly Out Of Her Buddaree Of A Bullavogue.
     But,  their  bright  little  contemporaries  notwithstanding,  on   the
morrowing morn of the suicidal murder of the unrescued expatriate, aslike as
asnake comes sliduant down that  oaktree onto the  duke of beavers, (you may
have  seen  some   liquidamber   exude  exotic   from  a  balsam  poplar  at
Parteen-a-lax Limestone. Road and cried Abies Magnifica! not, noble  fir?) a
quarter  of nine,  imploring his  resipiency, saw the  infallible  spike  of
smoke's jutstiff punctual from the seventh gable of our Quintus Centimachus'
porphyroid buttertower and then thirsty p.m. with oaths upon his lastingness
(En  caecos harauspices ! Annos  longos patimur !) the lamps of maintenance,
beaconsfarafield  innerhalf  the  zuggurat,  all  brevetnamed,  the  wasting
wyvern, the tawny of his  mane, the swinglowswaying bluepaw, the outstanding
man, the  lolllike  lady,  being  litten  for the long  (O land, how  long!)
lifesnight, with suffusion of fineglass transom and leadlight panes.
     Wherefore let it hardly by any being thinking be said either or thought
that the prisoner of that sacred edifice, were he an Ivor the Boneless or an
Olaf the Hide, was at his  best a onestone  parable, a rude breathing on the
void  of to be, a venter hearing his own bauchspeech in backwords, or,  more
strictly,  but  tristurned initials, the cluekey to  a worldroom beyond  the
roomwhorld,  for  scarce  one,  or  pathetically  few  of  his   dode  canal
sammenlivers  cared seriously or for long  to doubt with Kurt Iuld van Dijke
(the gravitational pull perceived by certain fixed residents and the capture
of  uncertain  comets  chancedrifting  through  our  system   suggesting  an
authenticitatem  of his aliquitudinis) the canonicity of  his existence as a
tesseract. Be still, O quick! Speak him dumb! Hush ye fronds of Ulma!
     Dispersal women wondered. Was she fast?
     Do  tell  us all about. As we want to hear  allabout. So tellus  tellas
allabouter. The why or whether she looked alottylike like ussies and whether
he had his wimdop like themses shut? Notes and queries, tipbids and answers,
the laugh and the shout,  the ards and downs. Now listed to one aneither and
liss them down and smoothen out your leaves of rose. The war is o'er. Wimwim
wimwim!  Was it Unity  Moore  or  Estella Swifte  or  Varina Fay  or  Quarta
Quaedam?  Toemaas, mark oom for yor ounckel! Pigeys,  hold  op med  yer leg!
Who, but who (for second time of asking) was then the  scourge  of the parts
about folkrich  Lucalizod it was wont to be asked, as, in ages behind of the
Homo Capite  Erectus,  what  price Peabody's money,  or,  to put it bluntly,
whence  is the herringtons' white cravat,  as, in epochs more cainozoic, who
struck  Buckley though nowadays as thentimes every schoolfilly of sevenscore
moons  or  more who  knowher  intimologies and  every colleen bawl aroof and
every redflammelwaving  warwife  and  widowpeace  upon  Dublin Wall for ever
knows as yayas is yayas how it was Buckleyself (we need no blooding paper to
tell it neither)  who struck and  the Russian generals, da!  da!, instead of
Buckley who was caddishly struck by him  when be herselves.  What  fullpried
paulpoison in the spy of three castles or which hatefilled smileyseller? And
that  such  a  vetriol of  venom,  that queen's head affranchisant, a  quiet
stinkingplaster zeal could cover, prepostered or postpaid! The loungelizards
of  the  pumproom  had  their  nine  days'  ~er,  and  pratschkats at  their
platschpails  too  and   holenpolendom   beside,  Szpaszpas  Szpissmas,  the
zhanyzhonies,  when, still believing in her  owenglass,  when  izarres  were
twinklins, that the upper reaches of her mouthless face  and her impermanent
waves were the better half of her,  one nearer him,  dearer  than all, first
warming  creature of his early morn, bondwoman of the man of the  house, and
murrmurr of all the mackavicks, she who had given his eye  for her bed and a
tooth for a child till one one and one ten and one hundred again, O me and O
ye !  cadet and prim, the hungray and anngreen (and if she is older now than
her  teeth she has  hair that is younger than thighne,  my  dear!)  she  who
shuttered him after his fall and waked him widowt sparing and gave  him keen
and  made him able and held adazillahs to each arche  of  his noes, she  who
will  not  rast her from  her running to seek him till, with the help of the
okeamic, some such time  that she shall have been after hiding the crumbends
of his enormousness in the  areyou lookingfor Pearlfar sea, (ur, uri, uria!)
stood forth, burnzburn  the gorggony  old danworld,  in  gogor's  name,  for
gagar's  sake, dragging  the countryside in her  train,  finickin  here  and
funickin there, with her louisequean's brogues and  her culunder  buzzle and
her litde  bolero boa and  all  and  two times  twenty  curlicornies for her
headdress, specks  on her  eyeux,  and  spudds on horeilles and  a circusfix
riding her Parisienne's  cockneze, a  vaunt her straddle from Equerry  Egon,
when Tinktink in  the churchclose clinked Steploajazzyma  Sunday, Sola, with
pawns, prelates  and  pookas pelotting in  her  piecebag,  for  Handiman the
Chomp, Esquoro, biskbask, to crush the slander's head.
     Wery weeny wight, plead for Morandmor! Notre Dame de la Ville, mercy of
thy  balmheartzyheat! Ogrowdnyk's  beyond  herbata tay, wort of the drogist.
Bulk him no bulkis. And let him rest, thou  wayfarre, and take no gravespoil
from him! Neither mar his mound! The bane of Tut is on it. Ware! But there's
a little lady waiting and her name  is A.L.P. And you'll agree.  She must be
she. For her holden heirheaps hanging down  her back.  He spenth his strenth
amok  haremscarems. Poppy Narancy, Giallia, Chlora, Marinka, Anileen, Parme.
And ilk a those dames had her rainbow huemoures yet for whilko her whims but
he  coined  a  cure.  Tifftiff  today, kissykissy  tonay  and  agelong  pine
tomauranna.  Then  who   but  Crippled-with-Children  would  speak   up  for
Dropping-with-Sweat?

     Sold him her lease of ninenineninetee,
     Tresses undresses so dyedyedaintee,
     Goo, the groot gudgeon, gulped it all.
     Hoo was the C. O. D.?
     Bum !

     At Island Bridge she met her tide.
     Attabom, attabom, attabombomboom!
     The Fin had a flux and his Ebba a ride.
     Attabom, attabom, attabombomboom!
     We're all up to the years in hues and cribies.
     That's what she's done for wee!
     Woe!

     Nomad may roam with  Nabuch but let naaman laugh at Jordan! For  we, we
have taken our sheet upon her  stones where we have hanged our hearts in her
trees; and we list, as she bibs us, by the waters of babalong.

        Chapter 5

     In the  name  of  Annah the Allmaziful, the Everliving,  the Bringer of
Plurabilities, haloed  be  her  eve,  her  singtime  sung, her  rill be run,
unhemmed as it is uneven!
     Her  untitled mamafesta  memorialising the Mosthighest has gone by many
names at  disjointed times. Thus we hear of, The  Augusta Angustissimost for
Old  Seabeastius'  Salvation, Rockabill Booby  in the Wave Trough, Here's to
the Relicts  of  All  Decencies,  Anna Stessa's Rise to Notice, Knickle Down
Duddy Gunne  and Arishe Sir Cannon,  My Golden  One and My  Selver  Wedding,
Amoury  Treestam  and  Icy  Siseule,  Saith  a Sawyer til  a  Strame, Ik dik
dopedope et tu mihimihi, Buy Birthplate for a Bite, Which of your Hesterdays
Mean Ye  to Morra? Hoebegunne the Hebrewer Hit Waterman the Brayned, Arcs in
His  Ceiling  Flee  Chinx  on  the Flur,  Rebus  de  Hibernicis, The Crazier
Letters, Groans of  a  Britoness, Peter Peopler  Picked a Plot to  Pitch his
Poppolin,  An Apology  for a Big (some such  nonoun as Husband or husboat or
hosebound is  probably understood  for  we have also the plutherplethoric My
Hoonsbood Hansbaad's  a Journey to  Porthergill  gone  and He Never  Has the
Hour), Ought  We  To  Visit Him? For  Ark  see  Zoo,  Cleopater's  Nedlework
Ficturing Aldborougham  on the Sahara with the  Coombing of the Cammmels and
the Parlourmaids  of Aegypt, Cock in the Pot  for Father, Placeat Vestrae, A
New Cure for an Old Clap, Where Portentos they'd Grow Gonder how I'd Wish  I
Woose  a  Geese; Gettle Nettie, Thrust him not,  When the  Myrtles of Venice
Played  to Bloccus's Line, To Plenge Me High He  Waives Chiltern on Friends,
Oremunds Queue Visits  Amen  Mart, E'en Tho'  I Granny a-be He would Fain Me
Cuddle, Twenty of Chambers, Weighty  Ten Beds and a Wan Ceteroom, I Led  the
Life, Through the Boxer Coxer Rising in the House with  the  Golden  Stairs,
The Following  Fork, He's my O'Jerusalem  and I'm  his Po, The Best  in  the
West, By the Stream  of  Zemzem  under  Zigzag  Hill, The Man That Made  His
Mother  in the Marlborry Train, Try Our Taal on a Taub, The  Log of Anny  to
the Base All,  Nopper Tipped a Nappiwenk to his Notylytl Dantsigirls, Prszss
Orel  Orel  the  King  of  Orlbrdsz,  Intimier  Minnelisp  of  an  Extorreor
Monolothe, Drink to Him, My Juckey, and Dhoult Bemine Thy Winnowing Sheet, I
Ask  You  to  Believe  I was  his Mistress, He Can  Explain,  From Victrolia
Nuancee to  Allbart Noahnsy, Da's a Daisy so Guimea  your Handsel  too, What
Barbaras Done to a Barrel Organ Before the Rank, Tank  and Bonnbtail, Huskvy
Admortal,  What Jumbo  made  to Jalice and  what Anisette to Him,  Ophelia's
Culpreints, Hear Hubty Hublin, My  Old Dansh, I am Older northe Rogues among
Whisht  I  Slips  and  He  Calls  Me   his  Dual  of  Ayessha,  Suppotes   a
Ventriliquorst  Merries a Corpse, Lapps for Finns This Funnycoon's Week, How
the Buckling Shut at Rush in January, Look to the Lady, From the Rise of the
Dudge Pupublick to the Fall of the Potstille, Of the Two Ways of Opening the
Mouth, I  have  not  Stopped Water Where  It  Should  Flow  and  I  Know the
Twentynine Names of Attraente, The Tortor of Tory Island Traits Galasia like
his Milchcow, From Abbeygate to Crowalley Through a Lift in the Lude, Smocks
for  Their  Graces and  Me Aunt for  Them Clodshoppers, How to  Pull a  Good
Horuscoup even when Oldsire is Dead to the World, Inn the Gleam of Waherlow,
Fathe He's Sukceded to My  Esperations, Thee Steps Forward, Two  Stops Back,
My Skin Appeals to Three Senses and My  Curly Lips Demand Columbkisses; Gage
Street on a Crany's  Savings, Them  Lads made a Trion of Battlewatschers and
They Totties a Doeit of Deers, In My  Lord's Bed  by  One Whore Went Through
It,  Mum  It  is All Over, Cowpoyride by Twelve Acre  Terriss  in the Unique
Estates of Amessican, He Gave me a Thou so I serve Him with Thee, Of all the
Wide  Torsos in all  the Wild Glen, O'Donogh,  White Donogh, He's Hue to  Me
Cry, I'm the Stitch in his Baskside You'd be Nought Without Mom, To Keep the
Huskies  off  the  Hustings and Picture  Pets from  Lifting  Shops,  Norsker
Torsker  Find  the  Poddle,  He  Perssed  Me  Here  with  the  Ardour  of  a
Tonnoburkes, A  Boob Was Weeping This Mower was Reaping, O'Loughlin, Up from
the Pit of  my Stomach I  Swish you the White of  the Mourning, Inglo-Andeen
Medoleys from Tommany  Moohr,  The Great Polynesional  Entertrainer Exhibits
Ballantine Brautchers with the Link of Natures, The Mimic of Meg Neg end the
Mackeys,   Entered   as   the  Lastest   Pigtarial  and  My  Pooridiocal  at
Stitchioner's Hall, Siegfield  Follies and or a  Gentlehomme's Faut Pas, See
the  First Book of Jealesies  Pessim, The Suspended Sentence, A Pretty Brick
Story for Childsize Heroes, As Lo Our Sleep, I Knew I'd Got it in Me so Thit
settles That,  Thonderbalt Captain Smeth and La Belle Sauvage  Pocahonteuse,
Way for Wet Week Welikin's Douchka Marianne, The Last of the Fingallians, It
Was Me  Egged  Him on to the Stork Exchange and Lent  my Dutiful Face to His
Customs,  Chee  Chee  Cheels on  their  China  Miction,  Pickedmeup  Peters,
Lumptytumtumpty had a Big Fall, Pimpimp Pimpimp, Measly Ventures of Two Lice
and the Fall of Fruit,  The Fokes Family Interior, If my Spreadeagles Wasn't
so Tight  I'd  Loosen  my  Cursits  on that Bunch of Maggiestraps, Allolosha
Popofetts and  Howke  Cotchme  Eye, Seen  Aples  and Thin Dyed, i  big U  to
Beleaves from Love and Mother, Fine's Fault was no Felon, Exat Delvin Renter
Life,The Flash that Flies from Vuggy's Eyes has Set Me  Hair On Fire, His is
the  House that Malt Made,  Divine Views from Back to the Front, Abe to Sare
Stood Icyk Neuter till Brahm  Taulked Him Common Sex, A Nibble  at  Eve Will
That  Bowal Relieve, Allfor Guineas, Sounds and Compliments  Libidous, Seven
Wives Awake Aweek,  Airy Ann and  Berber Blut,  Amy Licks Porter While Huffy
Chops Eads, Abbrace of Umbellas or a Tripple of Caines, Buttbutterbust, From
the  Manorlord Hoved to the Misses  O'Mollies and  from the Dames  to  their
Sames, Manyfestoons for the Colleagues on the Green, An Outstanding Back and
an Excellent Halfcentre if Called on, As Tree is Quick and Stone is White So
ts My Washing Done by Night,  First and Last Only True Account au  about the
Honorary Mirsu Earwicker, L.S.D., and the Snake (Nuggets!) by a Woman of the
World  who  only  can  Tell  Naked  Truths  about  a  Dear  Man and  all his
Conspirators how they all Tried to Fall  him Putting it all around Lucalizod
about Privates Earwicker and a Pair  of Sloppy Sluts plainly Showing all the
Unmentionability falsely Accusing about the Raincoats.
     The proteiform graph itself  is a polyhedron  of scripture. There was a
time  when  naif  alphabetters would have written  it down the  tracing of a
purely  deliquescent recidivist, possibly  ambidextrous,  snubnosed probably
and presenting a strangely profound rainbowl in his (or her) occiput. To the
hardily  curiosing  entomophilust  then it  has  shown a  very sexmosaic  of
nymphosis in which the eternal chimerahunter Oriolopos, now frond of sugars,
then  lief of saults, the sensory crowd in his belly coupled with an eye for
the goods trooth bewilderblissed  by  their night  effluvia  with guns  like
drums and fondlers like forceps persequestellates his vanessas from flore to
flore.  Somehows  this  sounds  like  the  purest  kidooleyoon  wherein  our
madernacerution  of lour lore  is  rich.  All's so  herou from  us him in  a
kitchernott darkness, by hasard and worn rolls arered, we must grope on till
Zerogh  hour like pou owl giaours as we  are would we salve aught of moments
for our aysore today.  Amousin  though  not  but.  Closer inspection of  the
bordereau  would  reveal a multiplicity of  personalities  inflicted  on the
documents or document and some prevision of virtual crime or crimes might be
made by anyone unwary enough before any suitable occasion for it or them had
so far  managed to  happen  along. In  fact,  under the  closed  eyes of the
inspectors   the   traits  featuring   the   chiaroscuro   coalesce,   their
contrarieties  eliminated,  in  one  stable  somebody  similarly  as  by the
providential  warring of heartshaker  with housebreaker  and of  dramdrinker
against freethinker our social something bowls along bumpily, experiencing a
jolting series of  prearranged disappointments, down the  long lane of (it's
as semper  as  oxhousehumper! generations, more  generations and still  more
generations.
     Say, baroun lousadoor, who  in hallhagal  wrote the  durn thing anyhow?
Erect,  beseated,  mountback, against a partywall, below freezigrade, by the
use  of  quill  or  style, with turbid or pellucid  mind, accompanied or the
reverse by mastication, interrupted by visit of seer to scribe or  of scribe
to site, atwixt  two showers  or  atosst of  a trike, rained  upon or  blown
around,  by  a rightdown regular  racer  from  the soil or by a  too  pained
whittlewit laden with the loot of learning?
     Now, patience; and remember patience is the great thing, and  above all
things else we must avoid anything like being or becoming out of patience. A
good plan used by worried business folk who  may not have had many momentums
to  master Kung's  doctrine of  the meang or  the  propriety codestruces  of
Carprimustimus  is  just  to  think  of  all  the sinking fund  of  patience
possessed  in  their conjoint  names  by both  brothers  Bruce with whom are
incorporated their Scotch  spider  and Elberfeld's  Calculating  Horses.  If
after years  upon years of delving in ditches dark  one tubthumper more than
others, Kinihoun or Kahanan, giardarner  or mear measenmanonger,  has got up
for the darnall  same purpose of reassuring  us  with all the  barbar of the
Carrageehouse that our great ascendant was properly speaking three syllables
less than his own surname (yes, yes, less!), that the ear of Fionn Earwicker
aforetime was the trademark of a broadcaster with wicker local jargon for an
ace's  patent  (Hear! Calls!  Everywhair!) then as to  this radiooscillating
epiepistle  to  which, cotton, silk or samite, kohol,  gall or brickdust, we
must ceaselessly  return, whereabouts exactly at  present in Siam,  Hell  or
Tophet under  that glorisol  which plays touraloup with  us in this Aludin's
Cove of our cagacity is that bright soandsuch to slip us the dinkum oil?
     Naysayers  we  know. To  conclude  purely negatively from  the positive
absence of  political odia and monetary requests that its  page cannot  ever
have been  a penproduct  of a man or woman of that period  or those parts is
only  one  more  unlookedfor  conclusion  leaped  at,  being  tantamount  to
inferring  from  the  nonpresence  of   inverted  commas  (sometimes  called
quotation marks) on any page  that its  author  was always  constitutionally
incapable of misappropriating the spoken words of others.
     Luckily there is another cant  to the  questy. Has any fellow,  of  the
dime a dozen  type,  it might with some profit  some dull evening quietly be
hinted--has  any usual sort  of ornery josser, flatchested fortyish, faintly
flatulent and  given to ratiocination by syncopation in  the elucidation  of
complications,of his greatest  Fung Yang dynasdescendanced,only  another the
son of, in fact, ever  looked sufficiently longly at a quite everydaylooking
stamped addressed envelope? Admittedly it is an outer husk: its face, in all
its featureful perfection of imperfection, is  its fortune: it exhibits only
the  civil  or  military  clothing  of  whatever  passionpallid  nudity   or
plaguepurple nakedness may happen  to  tuck  itself under  its flap.  Yet to
concentrate solely on the literal sense or even the psychological content of
any  document  to  the  sore neglect  of  the  enveloping  facts  themselves
circumstantiating it is just as hurtful to sound sense (and  let it be added
to the truest taste)  as were some fellow  in  the act of perhaps getting an
intro from another fellow turning out to be a friend in need of his, say, to
a lady of  the latter's  acquaintance, engaged in performing the elaborative
antecistral ceremony  of upstheres, straightaway to run off  and vision  her
plump  and  plain  in  her  natural  altogether,  preferring  to  close  his
blinkhard's  eyes to the ethiquethical fact that she was, after all, wearing
for the space of  the time  being  some  definite  articles of  evolutionary
clothing, inharmonious creations, a  captious critic might describe them as,
or not strictly necessary or a trifle irritating here and there, but for all
that suddenly full of local colour and personal perfume and suggestive, too,
of so very much more and capable of  being stretched, filled out, if need or
wish  were, of  having their surprisingly like coincidental  parts separated
don't they now, for  better survey by the deft  hand of an expert, don't you
know? Who in his  heart doubts either that the facts of feminine clothiering
are  there all  the time or  that the  feminine fiction,  stranger than  the
facts, is  there also at the same time, only  a little  to the rere? Or that
one  may be separated from the  other? Or that both may then be contemplated
simultaneously?  Or that each  may be taken up and considered in turn  apart
from the other?
     Here let a few artifacts fend in  their  own favour. The river felt she
wanted salt.  That  was  just where  Brien  came  in.  The country asked for
bearspaw for dindin! And boundin aboundin it got it surly. We who live under
heaven, we  of the clovery  kingdom, we middlesins people have often watched
the sky  overreaching  the land.  We suddenly have.  Our isle is Sainge. The
place.  That stern chuckler Mayhappy Mayhapnot,  once said to  repeation  in
that lutran conservatory way of his that Isitachapel-Asitalukin  was the one
place,  ult aut nult,  in this madh vaal of tares (whose verdhure's yellowed
therever  Phaiton  parks his  car  while its tamelised tay is  the drame  of
Drainophilias) where the possible was the improbable and  the improbable the
inevitable. If the proverbial  bishop of our holy and undivided with this me
ken or no me ken Zot is the Quiztune havvermashed had his twoe  nails on the
head we are in  for a sequentiality  of improbable possibles though possibly
nobody after  having grubbed  up a lock  of  cwold cworn aboove  his subject
probably in Harrystotalies or the vivle  will go  out of his way  to applaud
him on the onboiassed back of his remark for utterly impossible  as  are all
these  events they are probably as like those which  may have taken place as
any others which never took person at all are ever likely to be. Ahahn!
     About  that original hen. Midwinter (fruur  or kuur?) was in the offing
and  Premver  a promise of  a pril when,  as  kischabrigies sang  life's old
sahatsong, an  iceclad shiverer,  merest  of bantlings observed a  cold fowl
behaviourising   strangely  on  that   fatal  midden   or  chip  factory  or
comicalbottomed  copsjute  (dump  for  short)  afterwards changed  into  the
orangery when in the course of deeper demolition unexpectedly one  bushman's
holiday its  limon threw up a few spontaneous fragments  of orangepeel,  the
last  remains of  an outdoor meal  by some  unknown sunseeker  or placehider
illico way  back  in his  mistridden past. What child  of a strandlooper but
keepy little Kevin in the despondful surrounding of such sneezing cold would
ever have trouved up  on a strate that was called strete a motive for future
saintity by euchring the  finding  of the  Ardagh  chalice by  another heily
innocent  and  beachwalker  whilst trying  with  pious  clamour  to  wheedle
Tipperaw  raw raw  reeraw puteters out  of  Now  Sealand  in  spignt of  the
patchpurple of the massacre, a dual a duel to die to day, goddam and biggod,
sticks and stanks, of most of the Jacobiters.
     The   bird  in  the  case  was   Belinda  of  the  Dorans,a  more  than
quinquegintarian  (Terziis  prize  with  Serni   medal,  Cheepalizzy's  Hane
Exposition) and what she was  scratching  at  the  hour  of  klokking twelve
looked for  all this zogzag world like a  goodishsized sheet of  letterpaper
originating  by transhipt from  Boston  (Mass.) of the last  of the first to
Dear whom it proceded  to mention Maggy well  & allathome's health well only
the hate turned the mild on the van Houtens and the general's elections with
a lovely face  of  some born gentleman with a  beautiful present of  wedding
cakes  for  dear  thankyou Chriesty and with grand  funferall of poor Father
Michael don't forget unto life's & Muggy well how are you Maggy & hopes soon
to hear  well  & must now close  it with fondest to  the twoinns  with  four
crosskisses for holy  paul holey  comer holipoli whollyisland  pee  ess from
(locust  may  eat  all   but  this   sign  shall  they  never)  affectionate
largelooking  tache   of   tch.   The  stain,  and  that   a  teastain  (the
overcautelousness  of  the  masterbilker  here,  as usual,  signing the page
away), marked it  off  on the spout of the  moment as a  genuine  relique of
ancient Irish pleasant pottery of that  lydialike languishing class known as
a hurry-me-o'er-the-hazy.
     Why then how?
     Well,  almost any photoist  worth  his chemicots will tip anyone asking
him the teaser  that if a  negative of  a horse happens to melt enough while
drying, well, what  you do get is,  well, a positively grotesquely distorted
macromass of all sorts  of horsehappy values and  masses of meltwhile horse.
Tip. Well, this freely is what  must have occurred to our missive (there's a
sod of  a  turb for  you!  please wisp  off the grass!)  unfilthed  from the
boucher by the sagacity of  a lookmelittle likemelong hen.  Heated residence
in  the  heart of the  orangeflavoured mudmound  had  partly obliterated the
negative to start with, causing some features palpably nearer your pecker to
be swollen up  most grossly while  the farther back  we manage to wiggle the
more we need the loan of a lens to see as much as the hen saw. Tip.
     You is feeling like  you was  lost in  the bush, boy? You says: It is a
puling sample jungle of woods. You most shouts out: Bethicket me for a stump
of  a beech  if I have the poultriest  notions what the farest he all means.
Gee up, girly! The quad gospellers may own the targum but any of the Zingari
shoolerim may pick a peck of kindlings yet from the sack of auld hensyne.
     Lead,  kindly fowl! They always did: ask  the ages. What  bird has done
yesterday man may do  next year, be it fly, be it moult, be  it hatch, be it
agreement  in the nest.  For her socioscientific sense  is sound as  a bell,
sir, her  volucrine automutativeness  right on normalcy: she knows, she just
feels she was kind  of born to lay and love eggs (trust her to propagate the
species and  hoosh her fluffballs  safe through din and danger!); lastly but
mostly, in her genesic field it  is all game and no gammon; she is  ladylike
in  everything  she does and plays the gentleman's part  every  time. Let us
auspice it! Yes, before all this has  time to end the golden age must return
with  its vengeance.  Man will become dirigible,  Ague  will be rejuvenated,
woman  with  her ridiculous white  burden  will  reach  by  one step sublime
incubation,  the  manewanting human lioness  with her  dishorned  discipular
manram will lie down  together  publicly flank  upon  fleece. No, assuredly,
they are  not justified, those  gloompourers  who grouse  that  letters have
never  been quite  their old selves again since  that weird weekday in bleak
Janiveer (yet how palmy date in a waste's oasis!) when to the shock of both,
Biddy Doran looked at literature.
     And. She may  be a  mere marcella, this  midget madgetcy, Misthress  of
Arths.  But. It  is not a hear or say of some anomorous letter, signed  Toga
Girilis, (teasy  dear). We have a cop of her fist right against our nosibos.
We note the paper with her jotty  young watermark: Notre Dame du Bon March'.
And  she  has  a  heart  of  Arin!  What  lumililts  as  she fols  with  her
fallimineers and  her nadianods.  As  a strow will  shaw  she  does the wind
blague,  recting  to  show  the  rudess of a  robur curling  and shewing the
fansaties of a frizette. But how many of her readers realise that she is not
out to dizzledazzle with  a  graith uncouthrement  of postmantuam glasseries
from  the lapins  and the  grigs. Nuttings on her  wilelife!  Grabar  gooden
grandy    for    old   almeanium   adamologists   like   Dariaumaurius   and
Zovotrimaserovmeravmerouvian;  (dmzn!); she feel  plain  plate one flat fact
thing  and  if, lastways firdstwise, a man alones sine  anyon anyons utharas
has no  rates to done a kik at with anyon anakars about tutus  milking fores
and  the  rereres  on  the  outerrand  asikin  the  tutus  to  be forrarder.
Thingcrooklyexineverypasturesixdixlikencehimaroundhersthemaggerbykinkinkankanwithdownmindlookingated.
Mesdaims,  Marmouselles, Mescerfs! Silvapais! All schwants (schwrites) ischt
tell the cock's trootabout him. Kapak kapuk.  No minzies  matter.  He had to
see life foully the plak and the smut, (schwrites). There  were three men in
him (schwrites).  Dancings (schwrites) was his only ttoo feebles. With apple
harlottes.  And  a  little  mollvogels.  Spissially  (schwrites)  when  they
peaches.  Honeys  wore camelia paints. Yours  very truthful. Add dapple inn.
Yet is it but  an old story, the tale  of a Treestone with one  Ysold, of  a
Mons held by tentpegs and his pal whatholoosed on the run, what Cadman could
but Badman  wouldn't,  any Genoaman against  any Venis,  and why  Kate takes
charge of the waxworks.
     Let   us  now,  weather,  health,  dangers,  public  orders  and  other
circumstances permitting, of perfectly convenient, if you police, after you,
policepolice,   pardoning   mein,   ich  beam  so  fresch,  bey?  drop  this
jiggerypokery  and talk  straight turkey meet to mate, for while the ear, be
we mikealls or nicholists, may sometimes be  inclined to believe others  the
eye, whether  browned or nolensed, find it devilish hard now and again  even
to  believe  itself.   Habes  aures   et   num  videbis?   Habes  oculos  ac
mannepalpabuat? Tip  !  Drawing nearer to take our slant at  it (since after
all it has met with misfortune  while all underground), let us see all there
may remain to be seen.
     I  am a worker,  a tombstone mason, anxious  to pleace  averyburies and
jully  glad  when  Christmas  comes his once  ayear.  You  are a  poorjoist,
unctuous to polise  nopebobbies  and tunnibelly soully  when 'tis thime took
o'er home, gin. We cannot  say aye  to aye. We cannot  smile noes from noes.
Still. One  cannot help noticing that rather more than half of the lines run
north-south  in the Nemzes and Bukarahast  directions while  the  others  go
west-east  in  search from Maliziies with  Bulgarad for,  tiny tot though it
looks when schtschupnistling alongside  other incunabula,it has its cardinal
points for all that. These ruled barriers along which the traced words, run,
march,  halt,  walk,  stumble  at  doubtful  points,  stumble  up  again  in
comparative safety seem to have been drawn  first of all in a pretty checker
with lampblack and blackthorn. Such crossing is antechristian of course, but
the use of the homeborn shillelagh as an aid to calligraphy shows a distinct
advance from savagery to  barbarism. It  is seriously believed by some  that
the  intention may  have  been geodetic, or,  in  the  view of the  cannier,
domestic economical.  But by  writing thithaways  end  to  end and  turning,
turning  and  end  to  end  hithaways  writing and  with  lines  of  litters
slittering  up and louds  of latters slettering  down, the old semetomyplace
and  jupetbackagain from  tham  Let Rise till Hum Lit. Sleep, where  in  the
waste is the wisdom?
     Another  point,  in  addition  to  the original  sand,  pounce  powder,
drunkard paper or soft rag used (any vet or inhanger in ous sot's social can
see the seen for seemself, a wee ftofty od room,  the  cheery spluttered  on
the one  karrig, a darka  disheen of voos from Dalbania, any gotsquantity of
racky,  a portogal  and some buk setting out  on the sofer, you remember the
sort of softball sucker motru used to tell us when we were all biribiyas  or
nippies and messas)  it has acquired  accretions of terricious matter whilst
loitering in the past. The teatimestained terminal (say not the tag, mummer,
or  our show's a failure!) is a cosy  little brown study all to oneself and,
whether it be thumbprint, mademark  or just a poor trait of the artless, its
importance in  establishing  the identities in the  writer complexus (for if
the hand was one,  the minds  of active and agitated were more than so) will
be best  appreciated  by  never  forgetting that both  before and  after the
battle of the Boyne it was  a habit not to sign letters always. Tip.  And it
is  surely a lesser ignorance to write a word  with every consonant too  few
than to add  all too  many.  The  end? Say it with  missiles  then  and thus
arabesque  the  page. You  have your  cup of scalding Souchong, your taper's
waxen drop, your cat's paw, the clove or coffinnail you chewed or champed as
you  worded it, your lark in clear air. So why, pray,  sign anything as long
as every word, letter,  penstroke, paperspace is a perfect signature  of its
own? A  true friend is known much more easily, and better into the  bargain,
by  his personal touch,  habits  of full or undress, movements,  response to
appeals for charity than by his  footwear, say. And, speaking anent Tiberias
and other incestuish salacities among  gerontophils, a word of warning about
the tenderloined passion hinted at. Some softnosed peruser might mayhem take
it  up  erogenously as  the  usual case of spoons, prostituta in herba  plus
dinky pinks  deliberatively summersaulting  off her  bisexycle, at  the main
entrance of curate's  perpetual soutane suit  with her one  to see and awoh!
who  picks her up as gingerly as any balmbearer would  to feel whereupon the
virgin  was most  hurt and  nicely  asking: whyre have you  been so  grace a
mauling and where  were you chaste me child? Be who,  farther potential? and
so wider but we grisly old Sykos who have done our unsmiling bit on 'alices,
when they were yung and easily freudened, in  the penumbra of  the procuring
room and what oracular comepression we have had apply to them! could (did we
care  to sell our feebought silence in camera) tell our very moistnostrilled
one that father in such virgated contexts is not always that undemonstrative
relative (often held up  to our contumacy) who  settles our hashbill  for us
and what  an innocent allabroad's adverb such as Michaelly looks like can be
suggestive  of  under the  pudendascope  and, finally,  what  a  neurasthene
nympholept,   endocrine-pineal   typus,   of   inverted  parentage   with  a
prepossessing  drauma  present  in her past and a priapic  urge for congress
with  agnates  before  cognates  fundamentally  is  feeling  for  under  her
lubricitous meiosis when she refers with liking to  some feeler she fancie's
face. And  Mm. We could. Yet what need to say? 'Tis  as human a little story
as paper could  well carry, in  affect,  as singsing so  Salaman  susuing to
swittvitles while as unbluffingly blurtubruskblunt  as an Esra? the cat, the
cat's meeter, the  meeter's  cat's  wife,  the  meeter's  cat's  wife's half
better, the  meeter's cat's wife's half better's meeter, and so back to  our
horses, for  we also know, what we have perused from the pages of  I  Was  A
Gemral, that  Showting up  of  Bulsklivism  by  'Schottenboum',  that Father
Michael about this red time of  the white terror equals the old  regime  and
Margaret is the social revolution while cakes mean the party funds and  dear
thank you signifies national  gratitude.  In  fine,  we  have heard,  as  it
happened, of Spartacus intercellular. We are not corknered yet,dead hand! We
can  recall,  with  voluntears, the  froggy jew, and sweeter far  'twere now
westhinks in Dumbil's fair  city ere one  more year is o'er.  We tourned our
coasts to  the  good gay tunes.  When  from  down swords the  sea merged the
oldowth guns  and answer made the bold O' Dwyer. But. Est  modest in verbos.
Let a prostitute be whoso stands before a door and winks or parks herself in
the fornix near a  makeussin wall (sinsin!  sinsin!)  and the curate one who
brings strong waters  (gingin! gingin!),  but also,  and dinna forget,  that
there is  many  asleeps between someathome's first and  moreinausland's last
and that the beautiful  presence of waiting kates will until life's  (!)  be
more than enough to make  any milkmike in the language of  sweet tarts punch
hell's hate into his  twin nicky  and that Maggy's tea, or your  majesty, if
heard as  a boost from a  born gentleman  is (?). For if  the  lingo  gasped
between kicksheets,  however basically English, were to be preached from the
mouths of wickerchurchwardens and metaphysicians in the row and advokaatoes,
allvoyous,  demivoyelles, languoaths,  lesbiels, dentelles, gutterhowls  and
furtz, where would their practice be or where the human race itself were the
Pythagorean sesquipedalia of the panepistemion, however  apically Volapucky,
grunted  and  gromwelled,   ichabod,  habakuk,  opanoff,  uggamyg,  hapaxle,
gomenon, ppppfff,  over  country stiles, behind slated  dwellinghouses, down
blind lanes, or,  when all fruit fails, under  some sacking left on a coarse
cart? So  hath  been, love: tis tis: and will  be: till wears and  tears and
ages. Thief  us  the night, steal  we the air,  shawl thiner liefest,  mine!
Here,  Ohere,  insult  the fair! Traitor, bad hearer,  brave!  The lightning
look,  the  birding cry,  awe  from the  grave,  everflowing  on the  times.
Feueragusaria  iordenwater;  now godsun  shine on menday's daughter; a  good
clap, a fore marriage, a bad wake, tell hell's well; such is  manowife's lot
of  lose and win again, like he's gruen  quhiskers  on who's chin again, she
plucketed  them  out but they  grown in again.  So what are  you going to do
about it? O dear!
     If juness  she  saved! Ah  ho!  And  if  yulone  he  pouved! The  olold
stoliolum! From quiqui  quinet to michemiche chelet and a  jambebatiste to a
brulobrulo! It is  told  in  sounds in utter that, in  signs  so adds to, in
universal, in polygluttural,  in each auxiliary neutral  idiom, sordomutics,
florilingua,  sheltafocal,  flayflutter, a  con's  cubane,  a  pro's tutute,
strassarab,  ereperse and anythongue athall.  Since  nozzy  Nanette  tripped
palmyways with Highho Harry  there's a spurtfire turf a'kind o'kindling when
oft  as the souffsouff blows her peaties up  and a claypot wet for thee,  my
Sitys,  and  talkatalka tell Tibbs has eve:  and  whathough  (revilous  life
proving aye the death of ronaldses when winpower wine has bucked the kick on
poor  won  man)  billiousness  has  been  billiousness  during  milliums  of
millenions  and our mixed racings have been giving two hoots  or three jeers
for  the  grape, vine  and brew and Pieter's in Nieuw  Amsteldam and Paoli's
where  the poules go and rum  smelt his end  for him and he dined off  sooth
american  (it would  give one the frier even were one a normal Kettlelicker)
this oldworld  epistola of their  weatherings and their  marryings and their
buryings and their natural selections has combled tumbled down to us  fersch
and made-at-all-hours  like an ould cup  on tay. As I was  hottin me souser.
Haha! And as you was  caldin your dutchy hovel. Hoho! She tole the  tail  or
her toon. Huhu!
     Now,  kapnimancy and infusionism may  both  fit as tight as two trivets
but  while we  in  our  wee  free state, holding  to that  prestatute in our
charter, may have our irremovable  doubts as to the  whole sense of the lot,
the interpretation of  any phrase in the whole, the meaning of every word of
a  phrase so far deciphered out  of it,  however unfettered  our Irish daily
independence, we must vaunt no idle  dubiosity  as to its genuine authorship
and holusbolus authoritativeness. And let us bringtheecease to beakerings on
that clink, olmond bottler! On the face of it, to volt back to our desultory
horses, and for your roughshod mind, bafflelost bull, the affair  is a thing
once for  all  done  and there you are somewhere  and finished  in a certain
time, be it a day or a year or even supposing, it should eventually turn out
to be a serial  number of  goodness  gracious alone knows  how  many days or
years. Anyhow, somehow and somewhere, before the bookflood or after her ebb,
somebody  mentioned  by name  in  his telephone  directory,  Coccolanius  or
Gallotaurus, wrote  it, wrote it all, wrote it  all down, and there you are,
full  stop. O, undoubtedly yes,  and  very  potably  so, but one  who deeper
thinks  will always bear  in the baccbuccus of his mind that this  downright
there you are and there it is is only all in his eye. Why?
     Because, Soferim  Bebel, if  it  goes to that, (and dormerwindow gossip
will cry it from the housetops no surelier than the writing on the wall will
hue it to the mod of  men that mote in the  main street) every person, place
and thing in the  chaosmos  of Alle anyway connected  with  the gobblydumped
turkery was  moving and  changing  every  part of  the time: the  travelling
inkhorn (possibly pot), the hare and turtle pen  and paper, the  continually
more and less intermisunderstanding  minds of the  anticollaborators, the as
time  went on  as  it  will  variously  inflected,  differently  pronounced,
otherwise spelled,  changeably meaning vocable  scriptsigns. No, so  holp me
Petault, it is not a miseffectual whyacinthinous riot of blots and blurs and
bars and  balls and hoops and  wriggles  and juxtaposed  jottings  linked by
spurts of speed: it only looks  as like  it  as damn it; and, sure, we ought
really to rest thankful that at  this deleteful hour of dungflies dawning we
have even a written on  with dried ink scrap of  paper  at all to  show  for
ourselves,  tare  it  or leaf  it,  (and  we are lufted to ourselves as  the
soulfisher when he  led the cat out of the bout) after  all that we lost and
plundered of it even  to the hidmost  coignings of the earth and all  it has
gone through and  by all means, after  a good ground  kiss to Terracussa and
for wars  luck our lefftoff's flung over our home homoplate, cling  to it as
with drowning hands, hoping against hope all the while that, by the light of
philophosy, (and may she never folsage  us!) things will begin to clear up a
bit one way  or another within the next quarrel of an hour and  be hanged to
them as  ten  to one they  will  too, please the  pigs,  as  they  ought  to
categorically, as,  stricly between ourselves,there is a limit to all things
so this will never do.
     For, with that farmfrow's  foul flair for  that flayfell foxfetor, (the
calamite's  columitas  calling  for   calamitous   calamitance)   who   that
scrutinising  marvels at those indignant whiplooplashes;  those so prudently
bolted or blocked rounds;  the touching reminiscence of an incompletet trail
or dropped final; a round thousand  whirligig glorioles, prefaced by (alas!)
now  illegible  airy  plumeflights,  all  tiberiously  ambiembellishing  the
initials majuscule of Earwicker: the meant to be baffling chrismon trilithon
sign ~Tl,  finally  called after some  his hes  hecitency  Hec,which,  moved
contrawatchwise,  represents  his title in  sigla as  the smaller Þ,  fontly
called following a certain change  of state of grace of nature alp or delta,
when single, stands for or tautologically stands beside the consort: (though
for that matter, since  we have heard from Cathay cyrcles how the hen is not
mirely a  tick or two  after  the first  fifth  fourth of the  second eighth
twelfth  --  siangchang hongkong sansheneul  --  but  yirely  the other  and
thirtieth  of the ninth  from  the twentieth, our own  vulgar  432  and 1132
irrespectively, why not take the former for a village inn, the latter for an
upsidown bridge, a multiplication marking  for  crossroads ahead,  which you
like pothook for the family gibbet, their old fourwheedler for  the bucker's
field,  a tea  anyway for  a tryst someday,  and his  onesidemissing for  an
allblind  alley leading  to an Irish plot in  the  Champ de  Mors, not?) the
steady monologuy of the  interiors; the pardonable confusion  for which some
blame the cudgel and more blame the soot but unthanks to which the pees with
their caps awry are quite as often as not taken for kews with their tails in
their or are quite as often as not taken for pews with their tails  in their
mouths, thence  your  pristopher polombos, hence our  Kat Kresbyterians; the
curt witty wotty dashes never  quite  just right  at the  trim  trite  truth
letter; the sudden spluttered petulance of some  capItalIsed Middle; a  word
as  cunningly hidden in its maze of  confused drapery as a  fieldmouse in  a
nest of  coloured ribbons: that absurdly bullsfooted  bee declaring  with an
even plainer dummpshow than  does the mute commoner with us how hard a thing
it  is to mpe mporn a  gentlerman: and look at this  prepronominal funferal,
engraved  and retouched and edgewiped  and  puddenpadded,very like a whale's
egg farced with pemmican,as were it  sentenced  to be  nuzzled over  a  full
trillion  times  for ever and a night till his  noddle sink or swim by  that
ideal reader  suffering from an ideal insomnia:  all those red raddled obeli
cayennepeppercast over the text,  calling unnecessary attention  to  errors,
omissions, repetitions and misalignments: that (probably local  or personal)
variant  maggers for the  more generally  accepted majesty  which  is  but a
trifle  and  yet may  quietly  amuse: those superciliouslooking crisscrossed
Greek ees awkwardlike  perched there and  here out  of  date like sick  owls
hawked  back to Athens:  and the geegees  too, jesuistically formed at first
but  afterwards  genuflected aggrily toewards the occident: the  Ostrogothic
kakography affected  for certain  phrases  of  Etruscan  stabletalk  and, in
short, the learning betrayed  at almost every line's  end:  the headstrength
(at least eleven men of thirtytwo palfrycraft) revealed by a constant labour
to make a  ghimel pass  through  the eye of  an  iota:  this, for  instance,
utterly unexpected sinistrogyric  return  to one peculiar sore  point in the
past;  those  throne  open  doubleyous  (of an early  muddy terranean origin
whether man chooses to damn them  agglutinatively loo -- too -- blue -- face
-- ache or illvoodawpeehole or, kants  koorts, topplefouls) seated with such
floprightdown determination and reminding  uus  ineluctably of nature at her
naturalest  while  that  fretful  fidget  eff,  the  hornful digamma of your
bornabarbar,  rarely  heard now  save  when falling from  the  unfashionable
lipsus of some hetarosexual (used always in two boldfaced print types -- one
of  them  as  wrongheaded  as  his  Claudian  brother,  is  it  worth  while
interrupting to say?-- throughout the papyrus as the revise mark) stalks all
over the page broods ~~~ sensationseeking an idea, amid the verbiage, gaunt,
stands  dejectedly  in  the  diapered  window  margin,  with  its  basque of
bayleaves all aflutter about its forksfrogs, paces with a frown, jerking  to
and fro, flinging  phrases  here,  there, or returns  inhibited,  with  some
half-halted suggestion, F, dragging its shoestring; the curious warning sign
before our protoparent's ipsissima  verba (a  very  pure nondescript, by the
way, sometimes a palmtailed otter, more often the arbutus fruitflowerleaf of
the cainapple) which paleographers call a leak in the thatch or  the aranman
ingperwhis through  the  hole  of his  hat, indicating  that the words which
follow  may be taken in any order desired, hole of Aran  man the hat through
the whispering his ho (here keen  again and  begin  again to make soundsense
and  sensesound kin again); those haughtypitched disdotted aiches easily  of
the rariest inasdroll as most  of  the  jaywalking  eyes  we do plough  into
halve, unconnected,  principial, medial or  final, always  jims in the  jam,
sahib, as pipless as  threadworms: the innocent exhibitionism of those frank
yet  capricious  underlinings: that  strange  exotic  serpentine,  since  so
properly banished from our scripture, about as freakwing a wetterhand now as
to  see  a  rightheaded ladywhite don a corkhorse, which, in  its invincible
insolence  ever longer more and of more  morosity, seems to  uncoil spirally
and  swell lacertinelazily before our  eyes  under pressure of  the writer's
hand; the ungainly  musicianlessness so painted  in sculpting selfsounder ah
ha  as blackartful as  a podatus and  dumbfounder oh ho  oaproariose as  ten
canons  in skelterfugue: the studious  omission of year number and era  name
from the date, the one and only time when our copyist seems at least to have
grasped the  beauty of  restraint;  the lubricitous conjugation of  the last
with  the  first:  the  gipsy  mating of a grand  stylish gravedigging  with
secondbest  buns (an  interpolation:  these  munchables  occur  only in  the
Bootherbrowth  family of MSS., Bb -- Cod IV, Pap II, Brek XI, Lun  III, Dinn
XVII,  Sup  XXX,  Fullup  M D  C X C: the scholiast  has hungrily misheard a
deadman's toller as a muffinbell): the four shortened ampersands under which
we can glypse at  and feel for ourselves across all those rushyears the warm
soft short pants of the  quickscribbler:  the  vocative lapse  from which it
begins and the accusative hole in which it  ends itself; the aphasia of that
heroic agony of recalling a once loved number leading slip by  slipper  to a
general  amnesia of misnomering one's  own: next  those ars, rrrr! those ars
all  bellical, the  highpriest's  hieroglyph  of  kettletom  and  oddsbones,
wrasted redhandedly from  our hallowed  rubric prayer for truce with  booty,
O'Remus pro  Romulo,  and  rudely from  the fane's  pinnacle tossed down  by
porter to within an aim's ace of their quatrain  of rubyjets among Those Who
arse without  the  Temple  nor  since  Roe's  Distillery burn'd have quaff'd
Night's firefill'd  Cup  But jig  jog jug as Day  the Dicebox Throws, whang,
loyal six I  lead, out wi'yer  heart's bluid, blast  ye, and there she's for
you, sir, whang her, the fine ooman, rouge to her lobster  locks, the rossy,
whang, God and O'Mara has it with his ruddy old  Villain Rufus, wait, whang,
God  and you're another  he  hasn't  for there's my  spoil five  of  spuds's
trumps, whang, whack on his pigsking's Kisser for him, K.M. O'Mara where are
you?;  then  (coming over to  the left  aisle  corner  down)  the  cruciform
postscript from which three  basia or shorter  and smaller oscula  have been
overcarefully scraped away, plainly inspiring the tenebrous Tunc page of the
Book of Kells (and then it need not be lost sight  of that there are exactly
three squads of  candidates for the  crucian rose awaiting their turn in the
marginal panels of Columkiller, chugged in their three ballotboxes, then set
apart for such hanging committees, where two was enough for anyone, starting
with  old Matthew  himself,  as he with great distinction said then just  as
since then people  speaking  have fallen into the custom, when speaking to a
person, of saying two is  company when the third person is the person darkly
spoken of, and then that last labiolingual basium might be read as a suavium
if whoever the embracer then was wrote with a tongue in his (or perhaps her)
cheek as the case  may have been then)  and the fatal droopadwindle slope of
the  blamed  scrawl, a  sure  sign  of  imperfectible moral  blindness;  the
toomuchness, the fartoomanyness of  all those fourlegged ems: and why  spell
dear god with a big thick dhee (why, O why, O why?): the cut and dry aks and
wise form  of  the  semifinal; and, eighteenthly or  twentyfourthly,  but at
least, thank  Maurice,  lastly  when all is  zed and  done,  the  penelopean
patience of its last paraphe, a  colophon of no fewer than seven hundred and
thirtytwo  strokes  tailed  by  a  leaping  lasso--  who  thus at  all  this
marvelling  but will press on hotly to  see the vaulting  feminine libido of
those  interbranching ogham  sex upandinsweeps sternly controlled and easily
repersuaded by the uniform matteroffactness of a meandering male fist?
     Duff-Muggli,  who  now  may  be quoted by very  kind  arrangement  (his
dectroscophonious  photosensition  under suprasonic  light  control  may  be
logged  for by our  none  too distant futures  as soon  astone values can be
turned  out from  Chromophilomos, Limited  at a millicentime  the microamp),
first  called  this   kind  of  paddygoeasy  partnership  the  ulykkhean  or
tetrachiric  or  quadrumane or ducks and drakes  or debts and dishes perplex
(v.   Some   Forestallings   over   that    Studium   of   Sexophonologistic
Schizophrenesis, vol. xxiv, pp.  2-555) after the wellinformed  observation,
made  miles  apart from  the  Master  by Tung-Toyd (cf.  Later  Frustrations
amengst the Neomugglian  Teachings abaft the Semiunconscience,  passim) that
in the case of the littleknown periplic bestteller popularly associated with
the  names of the  wretched mariner  (trianforan  deffwedoff our  plumsucked
pattern shapekeeper) a Punic admiralty report, From MacPerson's Oshean Round
By the Tides  of  Jason's  Cruise,  had been cleverly capsized  and  saucily
republished  as a dodecanesian baedeker of  the  everytale-a-treat-in-itself
variety which could hope  satisfactorily to tickle me gander as game as your
goose.
     The unmistaken identity of the persons in the  Tiberiast duplex came to
light  in  the  most devious of ways. The  original document was  in what is
known as Hanno O'Nonhanno's unbrookable script, that is to say, it showed no
signs  of punctuation  of any sort. Yet on holding the  verso against a  lit
rush  this new book of Morses responded most remarkably  to the silent query
of our world's oldest  light and its recto let out the piquant fact  that it
was but pierced butnot punctured  (in the university sense of the  term)  by
numerous stabs and foliated gashes made by a pronged instrument. These paper
wounds, four in type, were gradually and correctly  understood to mean stop,
please  stop, do  please stop,  and  O  do  please  stop  respectively,  and
following up their  one true clue, the circumflexuous wall of a singleminded
men's  asylum, accentuated by bi tso  fb rok engl  a ssan dspl itch ina,  --
Yard inquiries pointed out  Þ that  they ad bin "provoked" ay Þ fork, of ...
grave Brof?sor; ...th ''s Br?ak -- fast -- table;  ; ac--tely prof?ssionally
piqu'd, to  =  introd--ce  a notion of time [--pon ...  plane  (?)  s--  ' '
f...¼'e'] by p--nct! ingh oles (sic) in  Ispace?! Deeply religious by nature
and position, and warmly attached to Thee, and smearbread and better and Him
and newlaidills, it was rightly suspected that such ire  could not have been
visited by  him  Brotfressor  Prenderguest  even  underwittingly,  upon  the
ancestral pneuma of one whom, with rheuma, he venerated shamelessly at least
once a week at Cockspur Common  as his apple in his eye  and her first boys'
best friend and, though plain English for a married lady misled heaps by the
way, yet when some  peerer or peeress detected that  the fourleaved shamrock
or quadrifoil jab was more  recurrent wherever the script was  clear and the
term terse and that these two were the selfsame spots naturally selected for
her perforations  by Dame Partlet on her dungheap, thinkers all put grown in
waterungspillfull  Pratiland only and a playful fowl and musical me and  not
you  in  any  case,  two  and  two together, and,  with  a  swarm of  bisses
honeyhunting after,  a sigh for shyme  (O, the pettybonny  rouge!) separated
modest mouths.  So  be it. And it  was.  The lettermaking of  the explots of
Fjorgn Camhelsson when he was in the Kvinnes country with Soldru's men. With
acknowledgment  of our  fervour of the first  instant he remains  years most
fainfully. For  postscrapt see spoils. Though  not yet had the sailor sipped
that  sup nor the humphar foamed to the  fill. And fox and geese still  kept
the peace around L'Auberge du Pere Adam.
     Small need after that, old Jeromesolem, old Huffsnuff, old Andycox, old
Olecasandrum, for quizzing your weekenders come to the R.Q. with: shoots off
in  a  hiss,  muddles  up  in  a  mussmass  and  his  whole's  a  dismantled
noondrunkard's son.  Howbeit we  heard not a son of sons to  leave by him to
oceanic society in his  old  man without  a thing  in  his  ignorance, Tulko
MacHooley.  And  it was thus  he was at every time, that  son, and the other
time, the day was in it and after the morrow  Diremood is the name is on the
writing chap of  the psalter, the juxtajunctor of  a dearmate and he passing
out of one desire into its fellow. The daughters are after going and loojing
for him, Torba's nicelookers of the fair neck. Wanted for millinary servance
to olderly's person by the Totty Askinses. Formelly confounded with amother.
Maybe growing  a moustache, did you say, with an adorable look of amuzement?
And uses noclass billiardhalls with an upandown ladder? Not  Hans the Curier
though  had he  had have  only  had some little  laughings and  some less of
cheeks and were he not so warried by his bulb of persecussion he could have,
ay, and would have, as  true as Essex  bridge. And not Gopheph go gossip,  I
declare  to man! Noe! To all's much relief  one's half  hypothesis  of  that
jabberjaw  ape amok  the showering jestnuts of Bruisanose  was hotly dropped
and  his  room  taken  up by  that  odious and  still  today  insufficiently
malestimated  notesnatcher (kak, pfooi,  bosh  and fiety,  much earny,  Gus,
poteen? Sez you!) Shem the Penman.

        Chapter 6

     So?
     Who do you no tonigh, lazy and gentleman?
     The echo is where in the back of the wodes; callhim forth!
     (Shaun  Mac Irewick,  briefdragger,  for the  concern  of  Messrs  Jhon
Jhamieson and Song, rated  one hundrick  and thin  per storehundred  on this
nightly quisquiquock of the twelve  apostrophes, set  by Jockit Mic Ereweak.
He misunderstruck and aim for am ollo of  number three of them and  left his
free natural ripostes to four of them in their own fine artful disorder.)
     I.  What secondtonone  myther rector and maximost bridgesmaker was  the
first to rise taller through his beanstale than the bluegum buaboababbaun or
the  giganteous Wellingtonia Sequoia; went  nudiboots  with trouters into  a
liffeyette when she was barely  in her tricklies;  was well known to claud a
conciliation cap onto the esker of his hooth;  sports a chainganger's albert
solemenly over his hullender's epulence; thought he  weighed a  new ton when
there  felled  his  first  lapapple;  gave  the  heinousness  of  choice  to
everyknight    betwixt    yesterdicks    and    twomaries;    had    sevenal
successivecoloured serebanmaids on the same big white drawringroam horthrug;
is  a Willbeforce to this  hour at house as he was  in heather;  pumped  the
catholick wartrey  and shocked the prodestung boyne;  killed his own hungery
self in  anger  as  a young  man; found fodder  for five when allmarken rose
goflooded; with Hirish  tutores Cornish made easy; voucher of rotables, toll
of the road;  bred manyheaded  stepsons for one leapyourown taughter; is too
funny for  a fish  and has too much outside for  an insect; like a  heptagon
crystal emprisoms  trues and fauss for  us;  is infinite swell  in unfitting
induments; once was  he shovelled and  once  was he arsoned and once was  he
inundered and she hung  him out billbailey; has  a quadrant  in his  tile to
tell Toler cad  a'clog  it is;  offers  chances to Long on but  stands up to
Legge before; found coal at  the end of his  harrow and mossroses behind the
seams; made a fort out of his postern  and wrote F.E.R.T. on his buckler; is
escapemaster-in-chief from  all  sorts of  houdingplaces;  if he  outharrods
against barkers,  to  the shoolbred he  acts whiteley; was evacuated at  the
mere  appearance of three  germhuns  and twice  besieged by  a  sweep;  from
zoomorphology to omnianimalism he is brooched by the spin of a coin; towers,
an eddistoon amid  the lampless,  casting swannbeams on the deep;  threatens
thunder  upon  malefactors and  sends whispers up fraufrau's froufrous; when
Dook Hookbackcrook upsits his ass booseworthies  jeer  and  junket but  they
boos him  oos  and baas  his aas  when he lukes  like  Hunkett  Plunkett; by
sosannsos and  search  a  party on a lady of  this  city; business,  reading
newspaper,  smoking  cigar,  arranging  tumblers  on  table,  eating  meals,
pleasure, etcetera, etcetera, pleasure, eating  meals, arranging tumblers on
table, smoking cigar, reading newspaper, business;  minerals, wash and brush
up, local views, juju toffee, comic and birthdays cards; those were the days
and he was their hero; pink sunset shower, red clay cloud, sorrow of Sahara,
oxhide  on Iren;  arraigned and  attainted,  listed and  lited,  pleaded and
proved;  catches his check at  banck  of  Indgangd and endurses his  doom at
chapel  exit; brain  of the  franks, hand  of  the christian,  tongue of the
north; commands to dinner and calls the bluff; has a block at Morgen's and a
hatache  all the  afternunch; plays  gehamerat  when  he's ernst  but misses
mausey when he's lustyg; walked as far as the Head where he sat in  state as
the Rump; shows Early English tracemarks and a marigold window with manigilt
lights,  a  myrioscope, two remarkable  piscines  and three  wellworthseeing
ambries; arches all portcullised and his nave dates from dots; is a horologe
unstoppable and the Benn of all bells; fuit, isst and herit and though  he's
mildewstaned he's mouldystoned; is a quercuss in the forest but plane member
for  Megalopolis;  mountunmighty,  faunonfleetfoot;  plank in our  platform,
blank in our  scouturn; hidal, in carucates  he  is enumerated,  hold as  an
earl, he counts; shipshaped phrase of buglooking words with a  form like the
easing moments of a graminivorous; to our dooms brought  he law, our manoirs
he made his vill of; was  an overgrind to the underground and acqueduced for
fierythroats;  sends  boys in socks acoughawhooping  when  he lets farth his
carbonoxside and silk stockings  show her  shapings  when he looses hose  on
hers;  stocks dry puder for the Ill people and pinkun's pellets  for all the
Pale;  gave  his  mundyfoot  to  Miserius,  her  pinch to  Anna  Livia, that
superfine pigtail  to  Cerisia Cerosia and quid rides to  Titius,  Caius and
Sempronius; made the man who had no notion of  shopkeepers  feel he'd rather
play the  duke  than  play  the gentleman; shot  two queans and shook  three
caskles  when he  won his game of dwarfs; fumes  inwards like a  strombolist
till he smokes at  both ends; manmote, befier of  him,  womankind,  pietad!;
shows  one  white  drift of  snow among the  gorsegrowth of his crown and  a
chaperon  of repentance  on  that which shed gore;  pause  and quies, triple
bill; went by metro for  the polis and then hoved by; to  the finders, hail!
woa, you  that seek!; whom fillth had plenished,  dearth  devoured;  hock is
leading, cocoa comes next, emery tries for the flag; can dance the O'Bruin's
polerpasse  at  Noolahn  to  his own orchistruss accompaniment;  took  place
before  the  internatural convention of  catholic  midwives and found  stead
before the  congress  for the  study of  endonational  calamities;  makes  a
delictuous entr'e and finishes  off the course between sweets and savouries;
flouts  for  forecasts, flairs  for finds and the  fun  of the  fray on  the
fairground;  cleared  out three hundred sixty five idles to  set up  one all
khalassal for  henwives hoping to have males;  the flawhoolagh, the grasping
one, the kindler of paschal  fire; forbids us  our trespassers as we forgate
him; the  phoenix be his  pyre, the  cineres  his sire!; piles big pelium on
little ossas like  the pilluls of hirculeads; has an eatupus  complex  and a
drinkthedregs kink; wurstmeats for chumps and cowcarlows for scullions; when
he plies for our favour is very trolly ours; two psychic espousals and three
desertions; may  be  matter  of  fact  now  but  was  futter of  magd  then;
Cattermole Hill, exmountain of flesh was reared up by stress  and sank under
strain; tank it up, dank it up, tells the tailor to his tout;  entoutcas for
a man,  but bit a thimble  for a maid; blimp, blump; a  dud letter, a sing a
song a  sylble;  a  byword,  a  sentence  with  surcease;  while stands  his
canyouseehim frails shall  fall; was  hatched  at  Cellbridge but ejoculated
abrood;  as it gan in  the biguinnengs so wound  up  in a  battle  of  Boss;
Roderick, Roderick, Roderick, O, you've gone the way of the Danes; variously
catalogued,  regularly regrouped; a bushboys holoday, a  quacker's mating, a
wenches' sandbath; the  same  homoheatherous checkinlossegg as when sollyeye
airly blew ye; real detonation but false report; spa mad but inn  sane; half
emillian via bogus census  but a no  street hausmann when  allphannd; is the
handiest of all andies and  a most alleghant  spot to dump your hump;  hands
his  secession to the new patricius but plumps plebmatically  for the bloody
old centuries; eats with doors open and ruts with gates closed; some dub him
Rotshield  and more limn him Rockyfellow; shows he's fly to  both demisfairs
but  thries to cover  up his  tracers; seven dovecotes cooclaim to have been
pigeonheim  to  this  homer,  Smerrnion,   Rhoebok,  Kolonsreagh,  Seapoint,
Quayhowth,  Ashtown,  Ratheny; independent  of the lordship of  chamberlain,
acknowledging  the rule of Rome; we saw thy farm at Useful  Prine, Domhnall,
Domhnall; reeks like Illbelpaese and  looks like  Iceland's ear;  lodged  at
quot places, lived  through tot reigns; takes a szumbath for his weekend and
a  wassarnap  for his refreskment; after  a  good bout  at stoolball  enjoys
Giroflee Giroflaa;  what  Nevermore missed  and Colombo  found;  believes in
everyman his  own goaldkeeper and in  Africa for the fullblacks; the  arc of
his drive was forty full and his stumps were pulled at eighty; boasts him to
the thick-inthews the oldest creater in Aryania and looks down  on the Suiss
family Collesons whom he calls les nouvelles roches; though  his heart, soul
and  spirit  turn  to  pharaoph times,  his  love, faith and hope  stick  to
futuerism;  light leglifters cense  him  souriantes  from  afore  while boor
browbenders curse  him grommelants to his  hindmost;  between  youlasses and
yeladst glimse of Even; the Lug his peak has, the Luk his pile; drinks tharr
and wodhar for his  asama and eats the unparishable sow to styve  off reglar
rack; the  beggars cloak  them reclined  about  his  paddystool, the  whores
winken him  as they walk their  side;  on Christienmas  at Advent Lodge, New
Yealand, after a lenty illness the roeverand Mr Easterling of pentecostitis,
no  followers  by bequest,  fanfare all private; Gone Where Glory  Waits Him
(Ball,  bulletist)  but  Not  Here  Yet  (Maxwell,  clark); comminxed  under
articles but phoenished a  borgiess; from  the  vat on  the bier through the
burre in the dark to the buttle of the bawn; is AI an the highest but Roh re
his root; filled fanned of hackleberries whenas all was tuck and toss up for
him as a yangster to fall fou of hockinbechers wherein he had gauged the use
of  raisin; ads  aliments, das doles, raps  rustics,  tams turmoil; sas seed
enough for a semination but sues skivvies on the sly; learned  to speak from
hand to mouth till he could talk earish with his  eyes shut; hacked his  way
through hickheckhocks  but hanged hishelp  from there  hereafters;  rialtos,
annesleyg,  binn and  balls to say nothing atolk of New  Comyn; the gleam of
the  glow of the shine  of  the sun through the dearth  of  the dirth on the
blush  of  the brick of  the viled ville of  Barnehulme  has dust turned  to
brown; these dyed  to tartan him, rueroot, dulse, bracken, teasel,  fuller's
ash, sundew and cress; long gunn but not for cotton; stood his sharp assault
of famine  but grew girther, girther and  girther; he has twenty four  or so
cousins germinating  in  the United States of America and a namesake with an
initial difference in the once kingdom  of Poland; his first's a young  rose
and  his second's FrenchEgyptian and his whole means  a slump at Christie's;
forth of his pierced part  came  the woman of his dreams, blood thicker then
water last trade overseas; buyshop of  Glintylook, eorl of Hoed;  you and  I
are in him surrented by brwn bldns; Elin's flee polt pelhaps but Hwang Chang
evelytime; he  one was your  of highbigpipey  boys but  fancy him as smoking
fags  his  at time of life;  Mount of  Mish,  Mell of Moy; had two  cardinal
ventures  and  three  capitol sinks; has  a  peep  in his  pocketbook and  a
packetboat in his  keep;  B.V.H., B.L.G.,  P.P.M.,  T.D.S.,  V.B.D., T.C.H.,
L.O.N.; is Breakfates, Lunger, Diener and Souper; as the streets were  paved
with cold  he felt his topperairy; taught himself skating and learned how to
fall; distinctly dirty but rather a dear;  hoveth  chieftains evrywehr, with
morder; Ostman Effendi, Serge Paddishaw; baases two mmany, outpriams al' his
parisites; first of the fenians, roi des fain'ants; his  Tiara of scones was
held  unfillable. till one  Liam Fail felled him in Westmunster; was  struck
out  of his sittem when he rowed  saulely to demask us  and to our appauling
predicament  brought as  plagues  from  Buddapest; put  a  matchhead  on  an
aspenstalk and set  the living  a  fire; speared  the  rod  and spoiled  the
lightning; married with cakes and repunked with pleasure; till he was buried
howhappy was he and he made  the welkins ring  with Up Micawber!; god at the
top  of  the staircase,  carrion on the mat of straw;  the  false  hood of a
spindler web  chokes the cavemouth of his  unsightliness  but  the nestlings
that liven his leafscreen sing him a lover of arbuties; we strike hands over
his bloodied warsheet  but  we are pledged entirely to his green mantle; our
friend vikelegal, our swaran foi; under  the four stones by his  streams who
vanished the wassailbowl at the joy of shells; Mora and Lora had a hill of a
high time looking down on his confusion till firm look in readiness, forward
spear and the windfoot of curach strewed the lakemist of  Lego over the last
of his fields;  we darkened for you, faulterer, in the year of  mourning but
we'll fidhil to the dimtwinklers when the streamy  morvenlight calls  up the
sunbeam;  his  striped  pantaloons,  his  rather  strange walk;  hereditatis
columna erecta, hagion chiton  eraphon; nods a  nap for the nonce  but crows
cheerio when they  get ecunemical;  is a simultaneous equator of elimbinated
integras when three upon one is by inspection improper; has the most conical
hodpiece of  confusianist heronim  and that chuchuffuous chinchin of his  is
like  a  footsey  kungoloo  around  Taishantyland;  he's  as  globeful  as a
gasometer of lithium and luridity and he was thrice ten  anular years before
he wallowed round Raggiant Circos; the cabalstone at the coping of his cavin
is  a  canine   constant  but  only  an  amirican  could  apparoxemete   the
apeupresiosity of  his atlast's alongement;  sticklered  rights and lefts at
Baddersdown in his  hunt  for the  boar  trwth  but made his  end  with  the
modareds  that came  at  him  in  Camlenstrete;  a  hunnibal  in  exhaustive
conflict, an otho to return;  burning  body to aiger air on melting mountain
in  wooing  wave;  we  go  into him sleepy  children,  we  come out  of  him
strucklers for life; he divested to save from the  Mrs Drownings their rival
queens  while  Grimshaw,  Bragshaw  and Renshaw made  off  with  his  storen
clothes; taxed  and rated, licensed and ranted; his threefaced stonehead was
found on a whitehorse hill and the print  of his costellous feet  is seen in
the goat's grasscircle; pull the  blind, toll  the deaf and call  dumb, lame
and  halty; Miraculone, Monstrucceleen; led the  upplaws at the Creation and
hissed  a snake charmer off her stays; hounded become haunter, hunter become
fox; harrier, marrier, terrier, tav; Olaph the  Oxman, Thorker the Tourable;
you  feel  he is  Vespasian  yet you  think  of him as Aurelius;  whugamore,
tradertory,  socianist,  commoniser; made a summer assault on our shores and
begiddy got his sands full; first he shot down Raglan  Road and then he tore
up  Marlborough  Place;  Cromlechheight  and  Crommalhill were  his farfamed
feetrests  when  our  lurch  as  lout  let  free  into  the  Lubar  heloved;
mareschalled  his wardmotes and delimited  the main; netted before nibbling,
can scarce turn a  scale but, grossed after meals, weighs a town in himself;
Banba  prayed for  his  conversion,  Beurla  missed that  grand old voice; a
Colossus  among cabbages,  the Melarancitrone  of fruits;  larger than life,
doughtier than death;  Gran Turco,  orege forment; lachsembulger, leperlean;
the  sparkle  of  his  genial fancy,  the  depth  of his calm sagacity,  the
clearness of his spotless honour, the flow of his boundless benevolence; our
family furbear, our tribal tarnpike; quary was he invincibled and cur was he
burked; partitioned  Irskaholm, united Irishmen; he took a svig  at  his own
methyr but she tested a bit gorky and  as for the salmon he was coming up in
him  all life  long;  comm, eilerdich hecklebury and  sawyer  thee  ,warden;
silent  as  the  bee  in  honey,  stark as the  breath  on hauwck, Costello,
Kinsella, Mahony,  Moran, though you rope  Amrique  your home ruler is  Dan;
figure right, he is hoisted by the scurve  of his shaggy neck,  figure left,
he is rationed in isobaric patties among the crew; one asks was he poisoned,
one  thinks how much  did he  leave; ex-gardener (Riesengebirger), fitted up
with planturous  existencies would  make Roseoogreedy (mite's)  little hose;
taut  sheets and  scuppers awash but the oil silk mack Liebsterpet micks his
aquascutum;  the  enjoyment  he took in kay women, the employment he gave to
gee men; sponsor to a squad of piercers, ally to a  host of rawlies; against
lightning, explosion, fire, earthquake,  flood,  whirlwind, burglary,  third
party, rot, loss of cash, loss of credit,  impact of vehicles; can  rant  as
grave as oxtail  soup and chat as gay  as a porto flippant; is unhesitent in
his  unionism  and yet  a  pigotted  nationalist; Sylviacola is  shy of him,
Matrosenhosens nose the joke; shows the sinews of peace in his chest-o-wars;
fiefeofhome,  ninehundred  and thirtunine years  of copyhold; is aldays open
for polemypolity's sake when he's not suntimes closed for the love of Janus;
sucks  life's  eleaxir from  the pettipickles of  the Jewess and  ruoulls in
sulks  if  any popeling  runs  down  the  Huguenots;  Boomaport,  Walleslee,
Ubermeerschall Blowcher  and  Supercharger, Monsieur Ducrow, Mister  Mudson,
master gardiner; to one he's just paunch and judex, to another full of beans
and   brehons;  hallucination,  cauchman,  ectoplasm;  passed   for   baabaa
blacksheep  till he  grew white woo woo  woolly;  was  drummatoysed  by  Mac
Milligan's  daughter and put  to music by  one shoebard; all fitzpatricks in
his emirate remember  him,  the boys  of wetford  hail him babu;  indanified
himself with boro  tribute and was schenkt publicly to brigstoll; was  given
the light in drey orchafts and entumuled in threeplexes; his likeness  is in
Terrecuite  and  he giveth rest to the rainbowed; lebriety, frothearnity and
quality; his reverse makes  a  virtue of necessity while  his obverse mars a
mother by invention; beskilk his gunwale and he's the second imperial, untie
points, unhook tenters  and he's lath and plaster; calls upon  Allthing when
he fails  to  appeal to Eachovos; basidens, ardree, kongsemma, rexregulorum;
stood into Dee  mouth, then backed broadside on Baulacleeva; either eldorado
or ultimate thole; a kraal of fou feud fires, a crawl of five pubs; laid out
lashings  of laveries to hunt down his family ancestors and then pled double
trouble or  quick quits to hush the buckers up; threw pebblets for luck over
one  sodden  shoulder and dragooned peoplades  armed to their teeth; pept as
Gaudio Gambrinus, grim as Potter the Grave; ace of arts, deuce of damimonds,
trouble of clubs, fear of  spates; cumbrum, cumbrum,  twiniceynurseys fore a
drum but tre to uno tips the scale; reeled the titleroll opposite a brace of
girdles in Silver on the Screen but was sequenced from the  set as Crookback
by  the even more titulars, Rick, Dave and Barry; he can get on as  early as
the  twentysecond  of  Mars  but  occasionally  he  doesn't  come  offbefore
Virgintiquinque  Germinal;  his  Indian name  is Hapapoosiesobjibway and his
number in  arithmosophy is  the  stars of  the  plough;  took weapon in  the
province of  the  pike and  let fling his  line on Eelwick; moves  in vicous
cicles yet remews the same; the drain rats bless  his  offals while the park
birds curse  his floodlights; Portobello, Equadocta, Therecocta, Percorello;
he pours into the softclad shellborn the hard cash earned in Watling Street;
his  birth proved accidental shows his death its  grave mistake;  brought us
giant ivy from the land of younkers  and bewitthered  Apostolopolos with the
gale of his gall; while satisfied that soft youthful  bright matchless girls
should  bosom  into fine  silkclad joyous blooming young  women  is  not  so
pleased that  heavy  swearsome  strongsmelling  irregularshaped  men  should
blottout active handsome wellformed frankeyed boys; herald hairyfair, alloaf
the wheat;  husband  your aunt and endow  your nepos;  hearken but hush  it,
screen him and  see;  time  is, an  archbishopric,  time was, a  tradesmen's
entrance; beckburn brooked with wath, scale scarred by scow; his rainfall is
a couple of kneehighs while his meanst grass temperature marked three in the
shade; is the meltingpoint of snow and the bubblingplace  of alcohol;  has a
tussle with  the trulls  and  then does  himself justice;  hinted at  in the
eschatological chapters of Humphrey's Justesse of the Jaypees and hunted for
by  Theban recensors who sniff there's something behind the Bug of the Deaf;
thc king was in his cornerwall melking mark so murry, the queen was steep in
armbour feeling fain and furry, the mayds was midst the hawthorns shoeing up
their hose, out pimps the back guards (pomp  !) and pump gun  they goes;  to
all his foretellers he reared a stone and for all his comethers he planted a
tree; forty acres, sixty miles, white stripe, red  stripe, washes  his fleet
in  annacrwatter; whou missed a porter so whot shall he do  for he wanted to
sit  for  Pimploco  but they've  caught him to stand  for  Sue?;  Dutchlord,
Dutchlord, overawes us;  Headmound, king and martyr, dunstung in the  Yeast,
Pitre-le-Pore-in Petrin, Barth-the-Grete-by-theExchange; he  hestens towards
dames troth and wedding  hand like the prince of Orange and  Nassau while he
has trinity left  behind  him  like Bowlbeggar Bill-the-Bustonly;  brow of a
hazelwood, pool in the  dark; changes  blowicks into bullocks and a  well of
Artesia  into  a  bird  of  Arabia;  the handwriting  on  his facewall,  the
cryptoconchoidsiphonostomata  in his exprussians; his  birthspot lies beyond
the herospont and his burialplot in the pleasant little field; is the yldist
kiosk on the pleninsula and the unguest hostel in Saint  Scholarland; walked
many hundreds and  many  score miles of  streets  and  lit thousands in  one
nightlights  in hectares of  windows;  his great wide cloak  lies on fifteen
acres and his little white  horse  decks by dozens  our doors;  O sorrow the
sail and woe  the rudder that were set  for Mairie Quai!; his suns the huns,
his  dartars the tartars, are plenty here today; who repulsed from his burst
the bombolts of Ostenton and  falchioned each flash  downsaduck in the deep;
apersonal problem, a locative enigma; upright one,  vehicule of arcanisation
in the field, lying  chap, floodsupplier of celiculation through ebblanes; a
part of the whole as a port for a whale; Dear Hewitt Castello, Equerry, were
daylighted with our outing and  are  looking  backwards  to unearly summers,
from  Rhoda  Dundrums;  is  above  the  seedfruit  level  and  outside   the
leguminiferous zone; when older links  lock older hearts then he'll resemble
she; can be built with glue and clippings, scrawled or voided on a buttress;
the night express sings his story, the  song of sparrownotes on his stave of
wires; he  crawls  with  lice, he  swarms with saggarts; is  as  quiet  as a
mursque but can be as noisy as a sonogog; was Dilmun when his date was palmy
and  Mudlin when  his nut was cracked; suck up the sease, lep laud at  ease,
one lip on his lap and one cushlin his crease; his porter has a mighty grasp
and his  baxters the boon  of broadwhite; as far as wind dries and rain eats
and sun turns and  water  bounds he is exalted  and depressed, assembled and
asundered;  go away, we are deluded, come back, we are disghosted; bored the
Ostrov, leapt the Inferus, swam  the Mabbul and flure the  Moyle;  like fat,
like fatlike tallow,  of greasefulness,  yea of  dripping greasefulness; did
not say to the old, old, did not  say  to  the  scorbutic, scorbutic; he has
founded  a house,  Uru, a house  he has founded to which he has assigned its
fate; bears a  raaven geulant on a fjeld  duiv; ruz the  halo offhis  varlet
when he appeared to  his  shecook as Haycock, Emmet, Boaro, Toaro, Osterich,
Mangy  and  Skunk; pressed  the  beer of  aled age out  of  the  nettles  of
rashness; put a roof on the lodge  for Hymn and  a coq  in his pot pro homo;
was dapifer then pancircensor then hortifex magnus; the  topes that  tippled
on him, the types that toppled off him; still starts our hares yet gates our
goat;  pocketbook packetboat, gapman  gunrun; the light of other days,  dire
dreary  darkness;  our  awful  dad, Timour of Tortur;  puzzling,  startling,
shocking,  nay,  perturbing; went puffing from king's brugh to new  customs,
doffing the gibbous off him to every breach of  all size; with Pa's new heft
and Papa's  new  helve  he's Papapa's old  cutlass Papapapa  left  us;  when
youngheaded  oldshouldered  and  middlishneck  aged  about;  caller  herring
everydaily,  turgid  tarpon overnight; see Loryon the  comaleon that changed
endocrine history by loeven his loaf with forty bannucks; she drove him dafe
till he driv her blind up; the pigeons doves be perchin all over him one day
on Baslesbridge and the ravens duv be pitchin their dark  nets after him the
next night behind Koenigstein's Arbour; tronf of the rep,  comf of the priv,
prosp  of  the  pub; his headwood  it's ideal if his feet are bally clay; he
crashed in the hollow of the park, trees down, as he soared in the vaguum of
the  phoenix, stones  up; looks like a  moultain  boultter and sounds like a
rude word;  the  mountain view, some lumin  pale  round a lamp of succar  in
boinyn  water;  three  shots a  puddy at up  blup saddle; made  up  to  Miss
MacCormack Ni Lacarthy who made off  with  Darly  Dermod, swank and swarthy;
once  diamond cut garnet now dammat cuts groany; you might find  him  at the
Florence but watch our for him  in Wynn's Hotel; theer's his bow and wheer's
his  leaker and heer lays his bequiet hearse,  deep; Swed Albiony, likeliest
villain of the place;  Hennery Canterel  -- Cockran, eggotisters, limitated;
we take our tays and frees our  fleas round sadurn's mounted foot; built the
Lund's kirk and destroyed the church's land; who guesse his title grabs  his
deeds;  fletch  and  prities,  fash  and  chaps;  artful  Juke  of  Wilysly;
Hugglebelly's  Funniral; Kukkuk Kallikak; heard in  camera  and excruciated;
boon   when   with   benches   billeted,   bann  if   buckshotbackshattered;
heavengendered, chaosfoedted,  earthborn; his father  presumptively ploughed
it deep  on overtime and  his mother as all  evince must have travailled her
fair share;  a footprinse on the Megacene, hetman unwhorsed by  Searingsand;
honorary captain of  the  extemporised fire brigade, reported to be friendly
with  the  police; the door is  still open; the old stock  collar is  coming
back; not forgetting the time you laughed  at Elder Charterhouse's duckwhite
pants and  the way you said the whole  township can see  his  hairy legs; by
stealth of a  kersse her aulburntress abaft  his nape  she  hung;  when  his
kettle  became a hearthsculdus our thorstyites  set their lymphyamphyre; his
yearletter concocted by masterhands of  assays, his hallmark  imposed by the
standard of wrought plate; a  pair of pectorals and a  triplescreen to get a
wind up; lights his  pipe with a rosin tree and hires a towhorse to haul his
shoes; cures slavey's scurvy, breaks barons boils; called to sell polosh and
was found later in a bedroom; has  his seat of  justice, his house of mercy,
his  com  o'copious  and his  stacks a'rye; prospector,  he had a rooksacht,
retrospector,  he holds the holpenstake; won the freedom of new yoke for the
minds of jugoslaves;  acts active, peddles in passivism  and is a  gorgon of
selfridgeousness; pours a laughsworth of his illformation  over a larmsworth
of salt; half  heard  the single maiden  speech La Belle spun to  her  Grand
Mount and wholed a lifetime by his ain fireside,wondering was  it hebrew set
to himmeltones or  the quicksilversong of  qwaternions;  his troubles may be
over  but his doubles have still  to come; the lobster pot that  crabbed our
keel, the garden  pet that spoiled our  squeezed peas; he stands in a lovely
park,  sea  is not far, importunate towns of  X, Y  and  Z are  easily  over
reached; is an excrescence to civilised humanity and  but  a wart on Europe;
wanamade singsigns to  soundsense an yit he wanna git all his flesch nuemaid
motts  truly  prural  and  plusible;  has  excisively  large  rings  and  is
uncustomarily  perfumed; lusteth ath  he  listeth  the  cleah whithpeh  of a
themise;  is a  prince of the fingallian  in a hiberniad of  hoolies; has  a
hodge to  wherry him and  a frenchy  to  curry him  and a  brabanson for his
beeter and a fritz at his switch;  was waylaid of a parker and beschotten by
a buckeley; kicks lintils when he's cuppy and casts Jacob's  arroroots, dime
after dime,  to poor waifstrays on  the perish; reads  the charms  of  H. C.
Endersen all the weaks  of his evenin and the crimes of Ivaun the  Taurrible
every  strongday  morn; soaps you soft  to your face and slaps  himself when
he's badend; owns the  bulgiest bungbarrel that  ever was tiptapped  in  the
privace of the Mullingar Inn; was bom with a  nuasilver tongue in his  mouth
and went round the coast of Iron with his lift hand to the scene; raised but
two fingers and yet smelt it would day; for whom it is easier to found a see
in Ebblannah than  for I or you to find a dubbeltye in Dampsterdamp; to live
with whom is a lifemayor and to know whom a liberal education; was dipped in
Hoily Olives and  chrysmed in Scent Otooles; hears  cricket on the earth but
annoys  the life out of predikants; still turns the durc's  ear of Darius to
the now thoroughly infurioted' one of God; made  Man with juts that jerk and
minted money mong  maney; likes a six acup  pudding  when  he's  come  whome
sweetwhome;  has come through all the  eras of  livsadventure from moonshine
and shampaying down  to clouts  and  pottled  porter;  woollem  the  farsed,
hahnreich the althe, charge  the sackend, writchad the thord; if  a mandrake
shricked to convultures at  last  surviving his birth the weibduck will wail
bitternly over the rotter's resurrection; loses weight in the moon night but
gird girder by the sundawn; with  one touch  of  nature set  a veiled  world
agrin  and went  within a sheet of tissuepaper of the option of three gaols;
who  could see at one blick a saumon taken with a lance,  hunters pursuing a
doe, a swallowship in full sail, a whyterobe  lifting a host; faced flappery
like old King Cnut and  turned his back like  Cincinnatus;  is a  farfar and
morefar and  a hoar father  Nakedbucker  in villas old as new; squats aquart
and cracks  aquaint when it's flaggin  in town  and on haven; blows whiskery
around his summit but  stehts stout upon his footles; stutters fore he falls
and goes mad entirely when he's waked; is Timb to the pearly mom and Tomb to
the mourning night; and  an he had the best bunbaked bricks in bould Babylon
for his pitching plays he'd be lost for the want of his wan wubblin wall?
     Answer: Finn MacCool!
     2. Does your mutter know your mike?
     Answer: When I tum meoptics, from suchurban prospects, 'tis my filial's
bosom,  doth behold with pride, that  pontificator, and circumvallator, with
his dam night  garrulous, slipt  by his side.  Ann  alive, the lisp  of her,
'twould grig mountains whisper her, and the bergs of  Iceland melt  in waves
of fire, and  her  spoonme-spondees, and her  dirckle-me-ondenees, make  the
Rageous Ossean, kneel and quaff a lyre! If Dann's dane, Ann's dirty, if he's
plane she's purty, if he's fane, she's flirty, with her auburnt streams, and
her coy cajoleries, and her dabblin drolleries,  for  to rouse his rudderup,
or  to drench his dreams. If hot Hammurabi, or cowld  Clesiastes, could espy
her  pranklings,  they'd burst bounds agin,  and renounce their  ruings, and
denounce their doings, for river and iver, and a night. Amin !
     3. Which title is the true-to-type motto-in-lieu for that Tick for Teac
thatchment painted witt wheth one darkness, where asnake is under clover and
birds  aprowl are in the rookeries and  a  magda  went to  monkishouse and a
riverpaard  was  spotted, which  is  not  Whichcroft  Whorort not Ousterholm
Dreyschluss not Haraldsby, grocer, not Vatandcan, vintner, not Houseboat and
Hive  not  Knox-atta-Belle not O'Faynix Coalprince not Wohn  Squarr Roomyeck
not Ebblawn  Downes not Le Decer Le Mieux not  Benjamin's Lea not Tholomew's
Whaddingtun gnot Antwarp gnat Musca not Corry's not Weir's not the  Arch not
The Smug  not The  Dotch  House not  The Uval nothing Grand nothing Splendid
(Grahot or Spletel) nayther Erat Est Erit noor Non michi sed luciphro?
     Answer: Thine obesity, O civilian, hits the felicitude of our orb!
     4. What  Irish  capitol  city (a dea o de